Selling With Kindness


Selling with kindness is a win-win, customer-focused process, driven by genuine thoughtfulness and honesty; creating mutual value for both buyer and seller. It is selling to people the way we want to be sold to. It is more of building relationship, based on trust, mutual respect, and love, rather than just engaging in transactions.

Selling with kindness helps sales people and their organisations to improve customer loyalty to their brands, overcome buying fears and enhance the brand reputation of businesses. When I do Selling with Kindness training for salespeople and marketers, they also find out that it is a win-win approach to selling for them and their customers.

In our world of fierce competition, salespeople and organisations must truly care about their customers’ interest if they really want to be the leader in their market in the long run. The customer is the king in any enterprise. The customer pays the employees, the management and the shareholders. Therefore, increasing customer loyalty and trust to a brand is the bottom-line for any serious business.

Business is all about increasing sales and reducing expenses. Again, customers do not care about our products or services until they know we care about them. Period!


Ethics of selling with kindness

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I normally discuss the seven ethics of selling with kindness during my training because selling is a serious business and it determines the success or failure of an enterprise. However, let me just share three important ethics any sales person or organisation that is determined to increase sales and achieve customer loyalty should be mindful of.

Selling is a mutual exchange of value. Selling is a process of exchange of benefits, not features. A business must always strive hard not just to meet customers’ satisfaction but exceed it. And this has more to do with caring and integrity than with product or service. It’s more of how we sell, not what we sell.

Selling isn’t something we do to people; it’s something we do for and with people. When salespeople realise that they are not simply doing their customers a favour but that they are also benefitting from the relationship, they tend to be more considerate and compassionate prior, during and after selling.

Long term selling success is building relationship with your clients or customers based on trust and rapport. People buy from people they trust, respect and appreciate.


Categories of customers

People are different. The same applies to customers. If you’ve ever sold anything, whether as a sales rep or as a marketing executive, then, you would agree with me that customers exhibit different behaviours. The crucial question is why? Simple. Buyers have different emotions, beliefs, experiences, personalities and characters. And until we can operate from their functioning zone and influence them positively, we may not get the best out of the relationship.

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Here are my four unique classifications of customers, based on my years of research.

The highly friendly people: These are customers that can easily smile at you and play with you. They like people and crave recognition and acceptance. Their greatest fear is rejection.

The result-oriented people: These are go-getters. They are action-driven and waste no time in making decisions. They are highly successful people. Their greatest fear is regret.

The highly organised people: These people take their time to make decisions. They are interested in the process more than the end result. Their greatest fear is making a mistake.

The well-detailed people: These people want all the facts and figures. They often probe more and dig deep for more information. Their greatest fear is making a wrong decision.


Customers are a combination of two or three of these traits but one of them is dominant than the others.

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Qualities of successful salespeople

There are four dominant traits of highly successful people, regardless their locations, products or services. They are:

Smart Goal Clarity: They set clear daily, weekly, monthly and yearly goals that inspire them to go to work. They have clear aspirations and direction as they go through life.

Strong Achievement Drive: Due to their high goal clarity they are able to unleash the hunger to become more and achieve more. They show high desire and commitment towards life, sales and success.

Sound Emotional Intelligence: They understand why people do what they do and how best to respond to people’s wants and needs.

Sincere Social Skills: They ask the right questions from customers, listen to them, care for them and show sincere understanding of their needs or wants. They see the world through other people’s eyes and think and act like others do.


ACTION PLAN: How can you develop the qualities of highly successful people? How can you sell to people the way they want to be sold to?


AFFIRMATION: I sell with kindness and integrity. I am blessed and highly favoured.

To be continued…


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